


What'd I Miss?

by crionsmush



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Angel Ryan Bergara, Car Accidents, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Guardian Angel, Minor Original Character(s), Non-Graphic Violence, Not Beta Read, Not a lot though, Reborn - Freeform, Rhett and Link cameo, Some Plot, Sorry Not Sorry, THERE IS NO CHEATING., Tags Contain Spoilers, Temporary Character Death, Worried Ryan Bergara, Zach's here too, but I don't know if it's graphic, help me, i made this at 3am, possibly graphic tho, shyan, there is some Sara/Shane, there's some fighting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2019-01-11
Packaged: 2019-09-17 10:14:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16972668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crionsmush/pseuds/crionsmush
Summary: Nothing like being reborn.A new person, a new you. At the same time, you are aren't that all different. Slightly, but not that far off from the original you. It was strange to say, what more if you had to experience it?And experiencing it was what your favourite ghost hunters did.





	1. breathing life is a gift

**Author's Note:**

> hi! this is my first time posting something on here, it's kinda cool. but, the whole thing was made purely by my brain who refused to shut up in the night and whipped this up real quick. so it's kind of crappy, but I'll try to make it enjoyable as I can!! It was supposed to be a oneshot, but the idea grew bigger.
> 
> I haven't watched bfu (or anything about buzzfeed really) in a loongg time, so it's kind of weird. but i visited it and suddenly I fell back into craze, aakakksks.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

_You Are Ryan Bergara._

It is the first thing he hears on the midst of nothingness, a clarification from a voice. A voice that was monotone, yet held a hint of holiness in it. It was cool to hear, yet frightening when it came out of the blue. When the man considers opening his eyes, he gets hit with a series of blurry memories.

A vehicle violently crashing, pain somewhere located in his chest, worried muffled cries, sirens from an ambulance, then the sound of a flatline on a monitor. It was all so odd. It came by so quickly, then disappears like it was nothing.

He doesn't remember anything else, or know anything from those memories. All he knows is his name and some of his preferences. It was saddening to him, not knowing why he's in an abyss, why he's here, the reasons as to why a voice gave him a name. He didn't even know what happened to the rest of his memories.

Yet, for some reason, it was also exciting, curiosity poking at his mind. He doesn't know how it was exciting and intriguing, or what came over him as he feat a soar of determination with a trickle of nervousness. He just feels it all. His mind was a pack full of complex emotions he didn't know how to handle at all, and it's telling him to put himself back into the world. And he will.

With the decision to return in mind. Slowly, he opens his eyes, and feels himself enter reality.

 

* * *

 

When his vision returns, he sees himself in a room full of white. A bed, several shelves and a monitor. There were also drawers and other furniture. “Woah.” Ryan awes at the location he was settled in, it makes him feel slightly conflicted for some reason. He pushes that feeling down and walks over to the drawer near the bed. One of the many items on it is a digital clock with bright, red numbers.

 _7:45 AM_.

Ryan raises his eyebrows then looks elsewhere. He notices a glow coming from him, to be specific, it came from behind. He extends his arm to feel whatever it was on his back, his body turning as well as he did so. He felt the presence of feathers. Instantly, his mind came to a bizarre conclusion.

Theory No. 1: he was half-bird.

'No, Ryan,' He told himself, shrugging the thought away. 'I am not a bird, for goodness sakes. What kind of bird even glows anyway?' He feels slight disappointment at himself, he slumps his shoulders. His hands resting again at his sides. He didn't know why there was a glowing thing on his back, fantastic. He sighs.

He makes a move to explore more of this peculiar room, that is until he hears chatter beyond the only door in this small room. His curiosity spiked, along with anticipation. There's other people here? Real, other people? People who aren't part bird?

He shakes his head. Of course there is other people, what was he thinking? He walks over to the door, he reaches a hand to open only to find out that his hand fazed through the doorknob. He swiftly recoils his hand out of surprise, muttering some words under his breath.

Ryan glances down at his hands. “What?” He mutters, he returns his gaze to the door. He tries to touch the door, his hand fazes through like it did with the knob. He mouths a shocked-surprised 'okay'. After a couple seconds, he reluctantly stretches his arm towards the door, when it went through, he let the rest of his body follow the action.

He was about to check himself to see if the door had any effect on him while going through, then his eyes caught people roaming around. His lips fall into a straight line. Everyone acted as if a guy just didn't just go through a door, or maybe they all had their backs facing him while went through? Could be possible.

Ryan straightens himself before walking through the hallway. Ryan notices that some people waited in front of the door, some were wearing white clothing, and some were entering or exiting rooms. There were also a few people in wheel chairs.

Immediately, he knows he's in a hospital. Putting two and two together weren't hard. Being in the building did bring odd feelings. Just like in the room he was previously in, he was conflicted by being in there. It heightened when he felt himself go through the people as they walked. It brought him warmth and brief knowledge of their emotions, each time he looked back at their reaction. They gave off the feeling of confusion, but contentment.

It was as if Ryan's presence boosted their feelings.

He halts, considering the thought. “That would be cool.” Ryan commented. He stares at the people he was surrounded with, he should test if that were to be true. And if he can bring positivity by doing something other than entering them. Which sounds wrong, but you get the idea, right?

What do you mean he's trying to avoid the fact he can go through doors, probably walls too if he wanted to, and people? He totally wasn't curling into a ball of distress and concern in his head. No, oh no.

He walks towards a couple. Both of them look apprehensive, he felt a pull towards them. His instincts telling him to help, which was what he was going to do initially. He'll question why he feels this way after testing out his thoughts.

“What if he doesn't make it, Will?” A woman with brown hair spoke, her eyes looked over at the male beside her with worry. Tears pricking at the edge of her eyes, distraught. The man doesn't say anything, more-or-less he doesn't seem bothered.

The poor woman shook violently, “Ann. I love you, but please shut up. You might make a scene.” The woman, An, shot the man with an offended look. Betrayal in her eyes, but she didn't say anything. She simply glared, she looked like she wanted to punch him.

Ann looked back on the door. “He is my brother and your best friend, I thought you cared about him!” She exclaimed in anger, but it was not loud enough to drag a crowd. She took Will's words on not making a scene. Will looked over her with disinterest, his eyes glassy.

Ryan decided to make a move. He was between the two and had no idea what to do, the two continued to silently argue with each other. Exchanging gazes with the two, he tried to focus on happiness to relieve the situation. One blink was all it took to see a ball of light in their chests, panicked, Ryan looked around. He could see the other people's lights as well.

The lights look more like blobs than lights, honestly. They all had different shades, from white to grey and grey to black. Glancing back at the couple, he sees their own blob-lights. Except the woman's blob-light slowly kept enlarging, as it did, the blob-light slowly shifted from white to grey. The man was the same, except his was slower.

Holy moly. Hoolyy crap this was stressful. Ryan somehow kept himself composed, he repeated himself to think on the bright side. He feels warmth on his hands, he looks down to see why. He sees his hands glow softly, he has a brief freak out in his head before looking back at the couple.

Not knowing what else to do, or was too caught up in the moment to think, he extends his palms to the blob-lights. Bringing the light to their chests, as his hand simply fazed through them.

The woman breaks down, and Ryan thought he did the wrong thing. Her hands held her head, muffling her sobs. The man stops, snapping out of whatever trance he was in. His eyes were no longer uncaring and glassy. He reaches out to rub her back, in which she flinched in response, but accepted the touch anyway.

Ryan held his breath as he watched the scene unfold, and was watching the blob-lights in interest.

“Ann - I..” Will started, and sighed. He moved closer to the woman. “I'm sorry. I do care about him, I'm worried as much as you are. I'm sorry I took it out on you, you didn't deserve any of what I said.” He confessed, soothing the woman. A sad, guilty face displayed on his face. His blob-light was shrinking, but its edges wavered.

She sniffed, taking a sharp inhale. She looked back at the man, she gave him a weak smile. “It's okay, Will. We'll be okay. We can sort it out at home, we can't do it here. In public.” Will looked around, before resting his eyes back at the lady. He sighed through his nostrils.

“But-”

“Will, we always fix it. No matter what. I can't stay mad at you anyway,” She takes a shaky inhale, then snickered sadly. “What do you think Stephen would say?” Will sniggered at her comment. Ryan guesses Stephen is whoever they were arguing about.

Will looks away, “'You two need to get yourselves some snickers.' Or something along those lines.” Will joked. Ann laughed, the atmosphere lightened pretty quickly. Will's blob-light stopped wavering, Ann's was also shaking, but had stopped. Both of their blob-lights stopped shaking. They were both small, and were both light grey. Nearly white, but not quite.

Ryan learned that he really needed to understand how those blobby lights work. Other than that, focusing on the task on hand. He did it! He did something good while staying here. His instincts that were once washed over by the need to help, save, and rescue returned to normal.

His instincts reacted to negativity, and he guesses he also needs to learn how to cope with that. He doesn't want to be walking down the road, only to feel negativity and suddenly subconsciously do a beeline towards that negativity and sort it out. And then once he fixes it, he feels another one and then another one. He can't go anywhere.

The two seemed happy and content, finally. Ryan blinked, and the blob-lights were gone. His eyebrows furrow in cue with his perplexed feeling. Is seeing the blob-lights some sort of sight or vision? If so, he also needs to control that. Damn it.

Nonetheless, he was really happy with what he did. He was proud of himself. Which somehow affected those around him, they looked slightly happier. Which made him both confused and pleased. One, because he made two people happy and now he's on a roll. Two, what did he do to make that happen.

Ryan kept doing things, learning more about his abilities. He also figured out he had a pair of soft glowing wings when he decided to explore rooms, and stumbled upon a bathroom. He saw himself in the mirror and had screamed in fear and spent minutes to tap his halo. He was an angel, who woulda thought it?

Exploring the hospital was quite the experience. Other than helping those who had blob-lights —which he had to blink several times in order to get that weird vision or sight to see them—, some he failed to see and he simply stepped in and out of their bodies. As creepy that may sound, it's literally what he did. He felt different emotions in each person. Amazing.

He went in multiple surgery rooms without knowing, screeching before fleeing in a dash. He walked in to a nurse poking a needle into a patient to either draw blood out to donate or to seek information about it. Either way, it made him cringe and slowly back away. Then he saw families reuniting with joy as they got good news, and that made him smile.

When the day slowly passed, he decided to leave the building. He saw more people, and he helped those who are in need. It was pretty cool. And being happy made his job kind of easier, simply being present made them feel a sense of positivity.

Suddenly, as he escaped a chase from a stray dog. He felt his chest warm up, it was a cozy feeling. Pleasant and calming. He pondered as to why, he held his hand to his chest. He looks around. The energy seems to be coming from a silhouette far away. Actually, now that he thinks of it. His instincts are blaring beyond maximum levels of help, save and rescue.

He wished he knew how to control his abilities though, he has a bit of a hold on them. He can kind of summon light from his hands whenever he wants, but he also learnt that he didn't necessarily need to use the light he used on the couple, and with everybody else that had black-ish and big blob-lights. Which helped immensely, he felt himself get tired every time he summoned light. Exhausted if there was a batch of people sad at once.

If he knew how to control his Blob Vision, then he would've seen why and who had the strongest amount of negativity. He didn't need to follow the feeling in his gut, it was like a game of Hot and Cold. When you get closer to the item you're supposed to find, you get hotter, when you get farther away, it gets colder. Except, whenever Ryan gets farther away from his main goal. His instincts and whole being scream at him to go back to the warm part.

And yes, he named the blob-light sight vision thing as _The Blob Vision_.

It was still quite strange, considering the warmth in his chest never happened before to any urges to help someone. This had to be a special case, then.  

Once he finds his the source to his instincts going rampant in the distance, He tries to blink, in an attempt to see how bad the situation really was. But the Blob Vision never came. Ryan sighed, and used his wings to catch up with his goal.

He sees a lanky brunette man with a big head, limbs that could go on for miles. He had his head down as he walks on the pavement. To be honest, even without the Blob Vision he could feel the internal agony from this poor person. It was seething, radiating from this man. Ryan wished him the best.

He takes the space in front of the sulking man, walking backwards as he usees a pace that matches the others. His eyes had a sea of emotion, so many emotions. Yet, he looked so distant from the world.

“So, you're the person who is in desperate need?” Ryan asked casually, as if he knew this man for a long time. He knows he can't hear him, nobody can. He learnt that from screeching and nobody heard him, he tried to speak to someone and that didn't work either. The person, of course, didn't answer. “I can fix that for you. I did so many times! You should've seen it, man. You would've been happy with me for sure.”

Still, the person continues to be silent. Ryan takes his time to examine the person, his chest really felt cozy around the guy. A sense of familiarity. Ryan looks up at him sadly, “Let me help you.” 

He tries to reach his hand out, to see if he can lift his spirits up a bit. Unfortunately, Ryan slowed his pace and this person was quick on his toes. Making quick strides. He passed through the angel, and boy, did the angel _know_ he passed through him.

Ryan gasps as he feels the sea of emotion clump his throat, choke him, tear his heart into smithereens, shatter his mind. It broke him. The agonizing pain, it was too much. He didn't even have the will to look around at the man to see if passing through him even helped. Ryan doubted it, with this amount of negativity and pain, it probably only helped with a tiny fraction.

He clurches at his chest, the comforting warmth was immediately taken away. It was cold, freezing, it was beyond uncomfortable. He hated it with every fibre of his being. 

Now, here's the thing. Whenever Ryan passes through a person, or a person passes through Ryan. He can feel the tippity top of the iceberg, he never experiences it all. Only to get enough feel about how the person is. Whatever Ryan just felt as Ryan walked through him, is horrible. Devastatingly horrible.

Once the feeling has been shaken off him, he turns to take one glance at the special case who walks away.

And there, he blinks.

And there, the Blob Vision has come to his aid.

His eyes widen as he sees the figure's blob-light devour the entirety of his being. If it weren't for the slight transparent in it's wake, he wouldn't be able to see the man at all through all the black that swirled in the blobby light. Ryan feels his breath hitch in his throat as he stared, It was terrifying.

Then he blinks, and the blob-light along with the Blob Vision disappears.

There is only a lonely, broken man walking down the pavement, withering in his own torment. It hurt Ryan to see someone go through this, nobody deserved such pain. It was then he decided on one thing.

He's not letting this special case go Unsolved.


	2. lonely soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan learns a little about why Shane is sad.
> 
> or,
> 
> Zach swings by and gives Shane a little pat on the back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i looked at my outline for the chapters today, and you know what I saw? I went off the rails on the first chapter, it wasn't supposed to be written that way. Therefore, affecting the second chapter. And now I have to try to compromise and try to change it back to it's original story, it's not that far of a change...But - my god.
> 
> I think I can go back on track next chapter.

Ryan flaps his elegant wings as he shifts from one place to another. Whenever he senses another person down in the dumps, he flies, he doesn't bother to walk as much anymore. He takes the way of flight instead, at first, there were multiple miserable attempts but eventually he got the hang of flying. He also flew around to explore the places the sulking person went by.

Once, Ryan thought about flying to one of the high buildings and falling off. All for the fun of it. He didn't do it because he thought it was insane, and also that it took too much time and the man would be far ahead. It was tempting, though.

The angel was interested as to where the special case headed to, he wondered if he was going home or going to a certain place. Like a mall or a special event, despite the fact that he didn't look like he wanted to go. Or if he even felt like going. Ryan's shoulders sagged at the thought, this poor dude.

He tried countless of times trying to add some light to his blob-light, boost his emotions, but it never really worked. Not saying it didn't affect the abomination surrounding the brunette, it's just that it wasn't effective he wished it would be. He soon gave up, he tries sometimes, but he knows it won't do much.

The walk got boring quick. He's contemplating whether this person is taking the long way around, or if this is the only way to get where he needs to go. If it is the former, he's gonna hit the wall. If he just wants to take a walk, then Ryan guesses it's fine. Exercise is important. 

Ryan walked beside the long legged person, he was tired from flying and everybody seemed fine. He simply listened to the noise around him that came from the city, cars that passed by. The chattering of people. It was alright. Everything was fine, he could follow whoever this person is as long as he gets to help him. He hopes his presence brings an positive vibe that's strong enough to help him sooner than later.

The man takes a left turn and goes into what appears to be a coffee shop, the brunette takes his place in the line. Looking at the menu and deciding on something. Ryan stands next to him, fidgeting with his hands. He waits until it was the taller one's turn.

“Hello sir, welcome to Starbucks. How may I help you?” A barista who appears to be in his late twenties spoke. She wore black top and jeans, and a dark green apron with a small logo. Ryan watched the person order. The brunette answers, “Iced coffee is fine.” After saying so, he grabs his wallet from his pants.

The woman nodded, “Can I get a name for your order?” She asked. Ryan turned his head to the other, also wanting to know what was his name.

“Shane.”

Ryan narrows his eyes and looked away. Something in his head turned when he heard the name, strange. The lady nods and walks elsewhere, going to machines to make the drink. The special case, Shane, gets his phone and usea it as he waits. Though, it wasn't long until the lady came back with his drink, he exchanged money for change then walked away.

He made to his way to a table, one near the windows. Ryan sat on the other side, he watched Shane look outside as he took a sip. The angel didn't know what to do honestly. It was just him and the other, alone in a coffee shop.

Ryan wished he could spark up a conversation and talk to Shane, ask why he's sad. It troubles him to see a person have such an enormous blob ball of light. His eyes catch the other still holding his phone, he sees him put his attention back to the device. The taller one stares at his phone for a good minute before chuckling sadly, thinking of something. Ryan tilts his head.

Ryan moved to the other side quickly, wondering what caused the chuckle. Shane starts scrolling downwards on whatever thing he has on his phone. Leaning forward to see what's displayed, he sees words on his phone. Squinting his eyes, it looks like a script for something. He wonders what's so special about it.

Shane mutters words under his breath, Ryan glances at him for a second before returning to the phone. Shane's thumb moves downward swiftly, his screen scrolling to the very top. There, he could see big letters which he assumes is the title.

Hot Daga.

“What.” Ryan spoke bluntly, he glances between Shane and his phone. He was so confused as to what's happening. What the heck is it? It looks like nonsense and probably is nonsense. Inside, he was a bit interested. But it still registered to him as nonsense. Shane continued to read some more. Ryan shakes his head, relaxing into the chair.

Whatever ever it was, it made Shane smile and that's all that matters.

 

* * *

  

Shane walked out the door, and he was back on the road. Ryan follows him, as usual. He feels better now that he got a name, he can stop calling him 'special case' and whatnot. Occasionally while he blinks, he sees the Blob Vision. He sees Shane's blob-light dim a little. He also needed to step back, because holy cow stepping inside the huge blob-light was blinding and terrible. It's like it weakens him, he'll think about it later.

Soon, Shane makes it to a building and he walks inside. There were people that talked around him, people on computers. It was like a workplace – Did Shane work here? Woah. Ryan moves around while not straying too far from Shane, watching people through and by him. He walks back near Shane, “Is this where you work?” He mutters, more so to himself than to the other. “This is so fascinating.”

A small man walks up to Shane. Making him halt in his place, Ryan nearly bumps into him. He feels the terrifying emotions claw at him. Thankfully, he didn't go through Shane and managed to take a step back. He turns his head to the side, looking at the newcomer.

The first thing Ryan thought about the guy was that he looked like a child.

He was a small brunette man, wearing casual clothing and wore glasses that sat on he end of his nose. Ryan squints his eyes, memory fuzzy the more he looks at him. “Shane!” The newcomer greeted happily, Shane nudges his iced coffee towards the shorter lad before he sips as his way of saying hello. “You doing okay, man? I've heard what happened about – ” The smaller one gets cut off by the tall man raising an index finger as he drinks.

Ryan stood between the two, a confused look on his face. About what? What happened? Why did he feel the need to ask if he was okay? Is Shane okay? Ryan felt the warmth tickling on his hands, itching to be summoned.

The taller one out of the two pulls the cup away from his mouth. “I'm okay, pretty chill actually. Had a walk, drank iced coffee. How's the others? The ol' Try Guys,” The male wearing glasses raises his eyebrows as he watched Shane, “The golden foursome.” Shane emphasized, using his free hand to open his palm and face it upwards then move it sideways, as if it was amazing what he just said. Ryan facepalmed.

The newcomer didn't take the bait, he wore a deadpan expression. “Shane, you can't fool me.”

Shane leans forward slightly, “Oh, but what if I'm fooling you right now? I'll make you think your name is Zacharie.” Shane makes a ghost noise after, leaning back. Ryan feels like eating popcorn for some reason as he stood there, watching the exchange unfold. He wants to help, but he's unable to, he can't. He's invisible to them, though there were a few cases he swore he saw some people react to him. Stil, he's invisible.

“Shane.”

Shane smiles, though it looked pained. It wasn't unnoticed by the angel or the newcomer. “Or perhaps you'd like Zachariah?” He adds. His head tilted to the side slightly.

“ _Shane_.”

Then, Shane takes a deep inhale. He stops. The two looking at each other, one that was concerned and one that was distant. There were no words, they simply stared at each other. Exchanging words. 

Shane turns his head to observe the other workers in the area. Some sent a wave and a smile his way, he returned the action kindly. The smaller sighs and adjusts his glasses before speaking, “Are you okay? Like, are you coping well with.. you know, the incident.” The taller stiffens slightly at the mention of an event, avoiding the other's eyes. Ryan's eyebrows furrow, confusion in his eyes. This didn't make sense yet, what did he mean? 

“I've just heard about it. I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope you're taking this well.”

Ah.

It clicks in Ryan's head, the poor man went through a loss. Is it a loved one? If so, He can't imagine how difficult it must be. Losing someone so dearly to you, if they were close enough, it probably felt like losing a piece of you. Merely imagining the pain made his heart sink, and the fact that he went through Shane and experience the onslaught of emotions, it was beyond pain.

What stage was Shane in? There are different stages in grief, right?

Speaking of Shane, he has his gaze on his almost empty cup of iced coffee. “I mean, I went for a walk. I tried to go outdoors, but it just feels lonely. It feels.. wrong.” Shane mumbles as, his voice low and shaky. “I didn't even want to come to work today, but here I am.” He adds with a weak laugh.

The two stare at each other, again. In a blink of an eye, the Blob Vision returns. The newcomer had a medium sized blob-light, but it was still grey-ish. Shane, on the other hand, was a beast that devoured him whole. The two blob-lights didn't over lap, despite them both being circular. However, Shane's blob-light turned into a big oval to give room to the other blob-lights.

“It's all my fault, Zach.” Shane utters sadly, his voice low and trembling. Zach, who is apparently the newcomer, slightly tightens his face, he obviously disagrees. He opens his mouth to reply. But he never gets a chance to, “If it weren't for me being so - foolish. He would've been here, standing, alive and happy. Spouting all the facts and stories about ghosts or some shit.”

Zach stays silent. He waired for Shane to say more, to vent more. He wouldn't have minded, he needed to let it out anyway. But when he didn't, he simply stared at Shane. He wasn't all that good at being sentimental or soothing another, but he would try. He may not know Shane that well, but he will help him. Taking a deep breath, he spoke:

“Shane, if there is anything I can tell you right now. It's that you should never blame yourself for something you couldn't prevent, I don't really know what happened during the incident, and if you don't feel free to talk about it. Then fine. But please, don't let this get to you. I know, it's..it's difficult and you can't just move on easily. But you have to start letting go soon, you know he would like that.” Zach gives himself a pat on the back for not wavering.

Whoever this ‘he’ was, Ryan knows he's in a better place now.

Shane didn't say anything, he sighed. An unreadable expression on his face, he was quiet. None of them spoke. He simply nodded, taking another sip. Now, his iced coffee is all gone. He shakes his empty cup before looking back to Zach. “Thank you very cup for the advice.” He said with a grin. It wasn't his best, but he tried.

The two pauses. Zach snorts, looking away with a facepalm. “For christ's sake,” He drawled with a laugh. Ryan still froze, an inscrutable look on his face slowly developing as he takes it in. “Oh, my goodness.” The angel whispered, his lips slowly curving up.

Ryan didn't notice it until now, but he realized he gained energy by being in a positive place, or surrounded by people who are cheerful. Was he feeding off of happiness? Or was he being energized by happiness? He didn't quite know. 

It was at this point, the Blob Vision disappears. But not without noticing Shane's blob-light decrease. Which relieved Ryan greatly, he really thought Shane didn't register the words Zach spoke and deflected it. He was happy he took it in. If that wasn't the case then what else could've made it shrink?

Shane smirked. “See what I did there?” Zach turned to with an 'i'm-not-amused' expression, but it was a futile attempt. The smaller shakes his head. Next, he looks around for something. He narrows his eyes, the other two follow his stare. He was looking at a clock.

“I think I might need to go now, Keith asked me to go to some place. I don't know what the fuck he's trying to do, or if any of the others are going to be there.” Zach mentions, looking back at Shane.

The brunette's shoulders droop. Aw, man. He just got into the groove of having someone else here. He didn't really talk to anyone during the past hours, caught up in all the recent events. He pushes that train of thought before it consumes him again. It was there, still. He tries to put that part of his thought on hiatus for a little while.

“Oh, alright. Tell him that his sim is totally dead.” Shane suggests. Leaving out the fact that all the other Try Guys are kind of dead too. Zach blows a brief raspberry, “Sure,” He was about to take his leave, but stops. Both Ryan and Shane tilt their heads in confusion.

Zach looks back at the tall man, “Are you gonna be fine?” 

At first, the man glances elsewhere before returning his gaze to Zach. Shane makes an 'okay' sign with his hand, a soft expression on his face. “Whatever floats your boat.” He answers, if you can even call it an answer. He avoided giving an actual one.

Zach narrows his eyes, “Shane, I'm serious.”

“I would make a dad joke. But I'll let it slide,” He starts. “I'm gonna be fine, for now anyway,” The other visibly relaxes at that statement. He waves goodbye and walks away.

Ryan turned his attention to Shane, wondering what he will do now. Suddenly, Shane's head perks up and calls out for the figure who just walked away. “Wait, Zach!” Zach pauses in his steps, turning around. He waits for Shane to catch up. What did he want?

Shane apologizes for taking up his time, the other doesn't mind. Then he continues to speak, “Is the equipment for Unsolved still there? I need to continue it.” The smaller pauses at the words. Beside them, a head tilts at the name mentioned.

Zach didn't reply at first, won't show remind him of..? - He wasn't going to question it, “I don't know, are you searching for a new co-host for the show?” Zach adjusted his glasses as he spoke. Shane affirmed his question by nodding, he had said it before in a Post Mortem. He would still think of the show. Besides, it was precious to someone; it was practically his baby. If only if that someone was here to keep talking about it.

Shane dumped the empty cup in his hand in a nearby bin, afterwards he settled his hands into the pocket of his pants. “The show must go on, am I right?” Shane stated with a hoot. Zach rolled his eyes. Him and his weird theatrics.

“I don't know, dude. Sorry.”

“It's okay, I'll just ask Devon or someone else if the equipment still lives. Now go on try not to get fucked, wherever you're going.” Zach chortled, looking away while shaking his head. He muttered something along the lines of 'goddamit' and 'sweet baby Jesus'. He said his goodbye and left, for real this time.

The two watched him leave. One turn to the right and he was gone from sight, Shane hums thoughtfully. Ryan turned his stare to Shane, wondering why he was doing so. He settles his gaze to ground, looking distant. The angel quirked his eyebrow up, puzzled by the action.

Ryan comes closer and raises his palm to snap his fingers, hoping it does something. “Shane?” The man blinks as his head perks upward. His eyes wide, looking like he was caught doing something. Which happened, maybe. Ryan recoils his hand as if he touched fire, his wings shot wide open in surprise as he yelps. He rests a hand on his chest, calming himself down, “Holy mother of sons and daughters.” He blurts out.

He watches the man look around, eyes slightly narrowing. He mumbles to himself, “Wait, what was I..?” The gears turn in his big head, then it clicks. “Ah, yeah. Devon.” He carries on his way as his legs carry him. Ryan quickly follows behind as his wings curl up against his back, leaving some space between him and Shane. He was startled, after all.

Even if he was shaken, he could feel his head turn gears. His mind was stuck to some parts of today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if they're a bit ooc, but I assume that happens with people who are going through grief,, aaksksk poor Shane. A lone ghoul. he still isn't fine.
> 
>  
> 
> ~~and I'm sorry if the story seems rushed, I'm practicing how to do Slow Burn stories while being out of the loop of writing,,~~
> 
>  
> 
> I hope you enjoy anyway, though!


	3. thee who follows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan and Shane have a pleasant time together.

Ryan had a bland day as he trails behind Shane while occasionally going astray to help others, the boredom nearly made him want to punch a wall, honestly. But he would gladly suffer through it for the well-being of the special case. And he got to learn a bit about Shane. Kind of.

Whatever this 'Unsolved' show was, it got to continue. Ryan couldn't help but replay the pleased smile that didn't reveal the amount of glee it really has, it was lovely to see. Devon asked him if he really did want to continue, then the lanky lad said something about 'thinking about the show even under dire circumstances'.

From what the angel gathered from the conversation, all Shane needed was a co-host and some research. Even though Ryan knew he couldn't be heard, he congratulated the other and his crew. If he had a crew. So far, he only knew that Devon had a part to play in it. He didn't know who else. He was curious, though.

After that, Ryan merely followed Shane wherever he went.

Ryan watched him sit down in front of a computer to edit, Ryan used this time to move around. Explore a bit, he didn't go too far though. He peaks his head to look at the man working on the computer, one last time to check to see if he's doing fine before going out to do his thing.

He decided he should use this time to practice his limits in powers, so he did. So far, Ryan learnt he can: become a lamp and glow in the dark. Use his halo as a boomerang or a frisbee. Create things out of thin air (whips, lasso, etc.) though it either had a limit to the summoning, or Ryan didn't have enough magic in him to conjure more items. He also learned how to control the Blob Vision! Hurray. There were more things he found out, too.

He had fun, even if it drained him every so often. His energy would drain, but if he stood in the midst of liveliness and positivity, he'd be fine again. Like a car getting fueled.

Then, he'd see Shane walking around and realized he had been carried away. He went back to gluing himself to the other's side, watching him interact. Though, multiple people came up to him about the incident. Ryan wished his abilities could manipulate people's words and change the topic instantly.

Ryan followed him when he walked around the building, walked out of the building, going to various places. In one of those various places, he could feel another presence there. It didn't feel friendly, at all. It felt strong and intimidating, it was worrisome. Luckily, whatever it was, the two never bumped into it.

Shane bumped into other people, though. During his time in the mall, he bumped into two people. The three of them ate together before parting ways, something about needing to shoot for video for a thing which was named along the lines of: 'Mythical Morning'. Or was it Mystical? Ryan couldn't remember.

During his walks, the angel saw people who faded in an out of reality. It was ominous and odd, they looked upset, mad, or normal. They were transparent, too. They weren't like other people. Once, one of them approached him, begging to be at rest. Ryan didn't know what he was talking about, or what 'being at rest' meant. But he tried to help.

It took a lot of retries and attempts, but with movement of his hands he managed to make the transparent person vanish. He was worried what he might've did, but he focused on the good side. Maybe they're at rest now. The movement of his hands had to be specific, and he tried to recite them again whenever another one came forth. There were lots of trials and errors. Eventually, he managed to memorize it.

So now he was helping both invisible, and visible people now. Fantastic. Though, there wasn't a lot of them to assist, especially the transparent ones. 

He notices that the sun is setting, he holds up his palms to shake Shane's arm. Of course, they fazed through. They always do. But for some reason, interacting with Shane felt natural. Ryan realized he'd done it a lot ever since he'd me him, he should probably stop.

He pulls his arms to his sides, stepping in front of the man in front of him. “Shane, it's time to go home.” Still, he doesn't answer. He merely walks, Ryan moves aside so he won't go through him. There's still torment in there, and the angel doesn't wish to go back. “We should go home.”

Ryan grunts as he watches Shane continue to stalk forwards. He stayed where he is with a blank expression. He knows he shouldn't feel aggravated for something he can't control, but he can't help it. He feels helpless. Ryan watches him walk further and further away.

Blinking, Ryan feels himself snap back to reality. Noticing the absence of another, he shakes his head before charging forward. As soon as he makes it to Shane, he takes a deep breath and walked beside him. “Goddamn, Shane. Do you always walk this fast?” He remarked. He might as well go to a marathon, which he will probably stop halfway.

He hoped his house wasn't far away. Even if it was, surely he brought his car. Right?

 

* * *

 

They needed a taxi.

Shane got tired of walking, thought it was nice at first because he was under the stars. Next thing you know, he's dying. Firstly, he was carrying a lot of grocery bags. Two, he feels like he just walked for miles, which is what technically happened. A waste of his time, really. What would _he_ say if he were here now?

Ryan sat beside him, fiddling with his hands. Glancing outside the window, there were a few tidbits of rain starting to pour. No doubt it'll start hammering soon. The angel sighs and relaxes against the chair, it was fairly okay in a taxi. His wings were surrounding him in an embrace.

It was quiet, and the atmosphere was nice. There were also pretty shining stars above, if Ryan squints hard enough. He'll see shapes. But with the car moving, he can't focus clearly on the constellations. It was a pity, he really liked the glowing sparks in the sky. He turns away from the window, looking to the man beside him.

Shane had his phone out, the stuff displayed on it when Ryan first looked was freaky. Sure, he was interested. But he was terrified when he kept reading, it was weird stories about weird things. He wonders if Shane was still searching for those right now, Ryan shakes his head in disapproval.

Soon, they made it home. Shane's house was a nice one-story house which had a pretty garden, Ryan rushed to the door eagerly. He knows he can walk through walls and doors, but it's better this way. It's fun to go through walls when there isn't a questionable scene awaiting him on the other side. Ryan shivers as he remembers the horrors. 

Shane puts his grocery bags on to one arm as he gets his keys, fumbling them and opening the door. Ryan takes swift steps as he enters, observing the room. Lovely sofas, long couches. The TV and the remotes, whatever people have in living rooms.

Ryan crosses his arms as he looks around. It's a bit messy, but he'll take what he can get. Besides, it looks cozy. The angel opened his mouth to make a remark, until he was cut off.

“I'm home!” A voice exclaimed. In response, Ryan's wings shot open in surprise as he jumped away from the source of the sudden words. His eyes wide, as he shouts. Afterwards, he realizes that it's just Shane.

He clutches a hand to his chest, trying to soothe his heart. He watches Shane entering another room. “Damn it, Shane,” He whispers. “I think I just got a stroke, and it's all your fault. You maniac.” He then follows him to the other room, mumbling words under his breath.

He hears plastic bags drop on to a counter. “Sara?” Shane calls, Ryan tilts his head. He then looks around to see if he can sense another. When he couldn't, he looked back at Shane sadly. He opened his mouth to say she most likely wasn't here, he bit his tongue. He reminds himself that Shane can't hear him, for once.

He sighs. As he does so, he notices a yellow sticky note on the refrigerator. If he squints, he could see writing on it. “Sara, I'm not in the mood to play hide and seek right now.” Shane exclaimed, his voice had an undertone of tiredness. Obviously still affected by the loss of whoever this other person was.

Ryan stalks closer to the fridge, as soon as he begins to read the sticky note. A hand grabs it away from his view. His face had scrunched up by the action, he turns around swiftly to shoot the owner of the hand an annoyed look. “You prick, I was reading that.” He whispers. His face softens as he goes closer. 

> ` _gone out to go visit some friends, might be long sorry ;; - i left a present for you in the microwave though!! hope you enjoy you tall dork. sorry I wasn't here for movie night yesterday, and today. ps: just so you know, even though i'm not here, I'll be here for you when you need me. i love you <3_`

Ryan watches the other's face have a look of warmth. His lips tugging upwards on the edges at the sight of the night, Ryan smiles at the sight. He's happy. Shane sighs and puts the sticky note into the bin, he puts all the items in the grocery bags into the different cupboards, some went into the fridge or the freezer.

This. This had a nice tone to it, the atmosphere was peaceful. He glances around the kitchen, then puts his gaze back to the open refrigerator since Shane was putting stuff here and there. It was then his eyes landed on a tiny blue stress ball on top of the refrigerator, seeing it makes his chest churn with discomfort. A wave of deja vu hits him, his eyes narrow at the round object. It sat near the edge on the top of the fridge.

His impulse tells him to go knock it off, pick it up, anything to let it out of his sight. And he does so, he extends an arm to reach for the ball. He flicks his hand, and the ball moved. Ryan took a moment to process the movement.

It moved.

The damn thing _moved_.

How the heck did he do this? Nothing is supposed to interact with him. Nothing. He could try flipping a table over, and the table wouldn't budge. Not that he tried that, or anything. His eyes widened as he watches the ball drop on to the counter top. Ryan shifts his surprised expression to Shane.

Hearing the bounce of the ball colliding with the counter, Shane turns his head to the direction of the sound. A puzzled noise exiting his mouth. He puts in the last item of food into the cupboard and closes it, he moves closer to the ball. “Why hello there, Blues Clues.” Shane muttered, a dry chuckle came after. He looks so calm, so calm that it was wrong.

Ryan could not believe him. “Shane, how in the actual — did you not see that?!” He knows Shane can't see him, therefore he couldn't see anything that could've pushed it. In his vision, if he saw the fall, nothing could've moved it. It moved on its own.

Shane grabbed the ball and bounced it in his hand, “Must've been the wind.”

Are you kidding me.

“That's wrong and you know it.” Ryan pointed a finger at the other's direction, a sharp look displayed. He watches the other put the ball back on top of the fridge, this time farther away from the edge. Disbelief washed over his features when Shane didn't even bother to question it.

Ryan has his mouth wide open, bewildered by this man. The other, of course, doesn't take notice and walks towards the microwave. Ryan eyes the taller one with a pointed look, his arms crossed.

Nonetheless, he stands beside Shane in front of the microwave. The other opens it, and there reveals what seems to be.. what is that? A sound of amused laughter made his head turn to the brunette beside him. A quizzical expression was what the angel wore. Whatever it is, Shane knew exactly what it was.

Shane retrieves the food from its place. He walks over to the window and lifts it up as he looks up at the sky, as of showing it to somebody. The notion looked odd to anyone watching, specifically Ryan since he was the only one watching everything unfold. The angel leans against the closest counter to the mad man by the window.

A lazy smile was what Shane wore as he points at the food with his other hand. “Look, little guy. Apple taters! Sara made it,” Shane squints his eyes at the food suddenly. “I think, hopefully.” Ryan chortled and rolled his eyes.

Shane puts down the plate of Apple taters on a nearby counter, specifically the one Ryan is leaning on. Ryan shuffled aside so that he won't be in the way of the other, except he forgot everything goes through him. He felt like an idiot afterwards.

The angel watched the other stare at the fold he left on the table with longing. The sight made Ryan feel upset, he sauntered towards the lanky fellow. He extended a hand to pat his shoulderto ease him. He quickly recoiled when Shane responded with a sudden turn of his head, a question mark above his head.

Shane shrugged and looked away. Meanwhile, Ryan was seconds away from having a cardiac arrest, standing stiff as he got figuratively stared down. Shane got himself an apple tater, he ate in silence as he pulled out his phone.

Ryan tilted his head at the display of food. He wondered what it tasted like, it looks delicious. It made his mouth water, yet his stomach stays full. It was a peculiar feeling. He wonders what he can and can't eat. Actually, how is he not at all feeling famished? He hasn't eaten or drank anything. Damn.

Looking at the food curiously, a question floats around in his head. The words fall out of his mouth before he could stop them, “What does it taste like, Shane?” Ryan spoke, wincing after he spoke. He should really stop talking out loud like this.

“It's good.”

Ryan slowly turned his head to the other in a dramatic sense, wide eyes that screamed questions. His eyes raked the other's face, examining for any indication that the reply was meant for him. Shane nods as he raises the apple tater, observing the little piece in his hand. It seems it was more directed to himself rather than the panicked angel in the room.

He's having a placid time, and Ryan is here having a stroke.

Ryan opened his mouth to speak, but Shane had already uttered words. “You would've liked it.”

The shorter took a moment in breathe, he should probably calm down. Shane is just murmuring random shit to himself, that was just fine. After taking a sharp inhale and exhale, Ryan decided to reply. Might as well accept the fact he won't talk to anyone anytime soon. “I probably would, honestly.”

Shane took another bite, eating it all. “Next thing we are missing now is the spaghetti.” He said, slightly muffled.

“Say what now?”

“Good ol' spaghetti, pretty sure we would be getting blessed by some nonexistent ghost god or something if we had apple tater and spaghetti as our offerings.” Shane continued, unbeknownst of the answers he was receiving from the other side. Along with the ridiculous baffled look of a deity beside him, a bewildered gesture accompanying it.

Ryan noticed that he could no longer feel his feet touching the ground, it appears that he was sitting on a fluffy cloud. It wasn't huge, just enough for him. He inhaled and embraced the unexpected, cause why not. He's talking to someone who isn't actually talking to him, he had a stroke and a heart attack, now he's floating on candy floss. Why not.

Shane bit into another tater, “What would you say now, if you were here?” Ryan knew this was pointed to the person he grieved over, so he didn't say anything. Even if he wanted to reply with a serene, ' _you gave me heart attacks and a stroke what do you expect_.'

Shane moved his body as he changed his voice, Ryan assumed he was mimicking the voice of someone. “'Whatever. Keep talking, i'll do the eating.',” Shane sniggered, “Actually. Maybe you'd eat all the food and have it for yourself?”

Ryan blew a brief raspberry. Whoever this person was, he seems like a nice person to be with. Mischievous, and a little shit. The two synchronized in laughing, two smiles that could light up the world. As it died down, the two continued to 'chatter' as one ate the fare displayed.

Shane left one apple tater in the microwave for this ‘Sara’ person. He strided towards the refrigerator and opened the freezer, grabbing something from it. Ryan peaked as to what that something might be, as soon as he got a glimpse of the container covered in ice. He cackled.

The lanky person pulled out ice-cream. All for him to eat, “Here we go.” Shane exclaimed, closing the freezer shut and got himself a spoon. Ryan wore a childish smile as he watched. “Dessert shall be served.” Shane announced.

Ryan crossed his arms, shifting to a cross-sitting position on the cloud he sat on. “I can't believe you, man.” He muttered. Shane made his way to his bedroom, turned on the TV and switched on a movie. A movie about a bear named Paddington, Ryan was instantly hooked. 

Shane kept talking to himself from time to time, and Ryan replied to all of them. It was as if they had a conversation, it was fun to be a part of. The atmosphere was cozy and lovely, it had positive vibes all around. Beautiful.

It was only them in their little bubble. There was no world, no other sound than the delightful chatter of the two boys and the TV. Ryan felt the familiar warmth in chest, the same sensation when he found his special case. It was wonderful.

And maybe, just maybe, Shane felt some of that warmth too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there honestly won't be a lot of Sara and Shane because of plot, but I just had to put my girl in! she's a sweet heart and Shane needs somebody to help him get through grief.
> 
> I hope you're enjoying so far!


	4. count from one to three, get that thing away from me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan has an exhausting day.
> 
> Or,
> 
> Ryan kicks some ass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: contains a fight, I don't know if it's graphic enough but I'd still but this here just in case!

Ryan watched the silly lanky fellow throughout the whole day. He still seemed to stop and stare at certain things, then continued his day like it was nothing. Nonetheless, Ryan still stood beside him. Watching him, commenting on whatever silly crap he was doing. He watched him get his car out and drive to the building he was in before.

He saw the same buildings as Shane drive past, some cars driving on the road. In this moment, Ryan just couldn't help but think ‘why am I doing this again?’. Sure, it may have been his angelic impulse because he saw Shane in distress. Which, he still is here because of that. But what if there was another reason? If so, what was it?

Why, out of all the people in the area, did he feel attracted to Shane?

Ryan slightly pinks, he raises his hand to cover his face. Not that kind of attraction of course. Oh, no. He just met the guy, there was no way he was into him like that. He feels attracted to him like a moth to a light. Which, also doesn't include feelings. No.

Looking back, he felt a pull. In the back of his mind, he looked so familiar. Everything was familiar ever since he'd met the lanky person. It was strange, in a good way of course. Whenever he tries to think of a memory with the things he thought were familiar, his mind draws a blank. Actually, simply thinking of the past makes his mind draw several blanks; his mind would give him either really, really blurry and fuzzy memories or the odd flashing ones.

By ‘the odd flashing ones’, it's the memories where he hears a vehicle crash very harshly, a brief surge of pain somewhere in his chest, someone's muffled worried sobs, sirens from what he guessed was an ambulance, and then white noise after the flatline of a monitor. Those are the only memories he vividly yet fuzzily remember, in other words, they're the only clear ones.

He doesn't know what they mean, what it meant for him, who those sobs came from. It was strange and frustrating. He doesn't know much of himself. He doesn't know _who_ he is, and holy moly that gave the angel a mind trip.

He knows he's an angel, because apparently his mind already had that information. It supplies information about angels, somewhat. How they are holy, help everyone, but he doesn't know if he's acting like one properly. Other than that, he's male, and.. and that his name is Ryan Bergara.

Good riddance. He doesn't know anything about himself.

The days go on by. Shane is still going through the process of moving on, he learnt how much of a sweetheart Sara is, how happy he makes him. Even if the Blob Vision tells him otherwise, that the battle inside Shane still exists. He saw them watching a movie late in the night, a movie called _Paddington_. Ryan fell in love with it so fast.

When he side-glanced to the two, he would see Shane watching the movie with a sad look on his face. His eyes glassy. Ryan wondered what made him so sad, was it the movie? Did he not like it? Ryan tried not to think of it too much. He rests his hand on Shane's hand, trying to send comforting vibes.

He was with him as he went through work. There was this guy called Steven who asked Shane if he wanted to hang out with him and another, supposedly to keep him company and all. Watch after him, basically. Shane said that he'll think about it, and said something about ‘Worth it winning the roast wars’ as a joke. Ryan doesn't understand, he doesn't question it yet.

Ryan learnt a little about Shane's work. He worked in ‘Buzzfeed’. He was on a show called _Unsolved_ , which is still running. The angel thought there was only one show, and was proven wrong. There were others. He felt like he knew that, though. He felt that it was unnecessary to learn about something that he knew already, and he didn't know why. He doesn't know of these things, and yet he does.

Speaking of Unsolved, Shane was able to get a co-host. A brunette man with green eyes, not tall as Shane, and had a decent face. Ryan saw him research, edit, talk and speak of theories in a weird voice. Ryan thought it was amazing. He tried to mimic Shane's weird voice whenever he reads about the place and the theories, Ryan came to the conclusion that his voice probably sounded better. Though, he loved both voices just as much.

He followed Shane and the co-host to places. Like, sidewalks or houses that someone supposedly died in. The route of murderers. It didn't scare him, they were just walking around. Ryan was able to use this to help other people.

Then, they went to haunted places.

Now that, that scared the daylights out of him, besides the fact that the places they went to were truly horrifying and scary (though some were weak, and Ryan only felt anxious.). He felt another presence, and he felt that presence following him. When he saw them, they were simple transparent people. Some cases, they were able to throw things around harshly. And Ryan nearly pooped his pants.

He was able to ward them off. Off from Shane, the co-host, and his crew. Some were passive and only wanted to stay with Ryan to have a chat, they were nice. The transparent people usually told him more about the place. Then Ryan did hand movements and put them to rest when he asked if he could do so, few said no, saying they needed to have more time. Most said yes, wanting nothing more than to finally be at ease.

Ryan thought what it was like, being at ease. It sounded lovely.

He really, really thought of it when Shane and company went to a certain mansion.

Apparently, they have one episode that is the ‘demon episode’. Now, Ryan doesn't know what demons are, but if the wary and anxious fear in his gut was anything to go for, they were most-likely a threat. A big one.

The house was somewhat active. Lots of awful, awful energy that floats in the air. The co-host's head shot upwards, hearing a creek on the floor above them. “Wha – Did you hear that?” He quivered, Shane looks upwards. The lanky man doesn't seem afraid, maybe a little bothered but not afraid. He turns his head to the co-host with a comforting look. “It's just the wind.”

Ryan deadpans. There's something up there, nothing like an intimidating aura, just a nervous one. He looks at the ceiling, he opens his wings and prepares himself to fly upwards. He's scared, very scared. But he needs to protect Shane and his crew.

When he stuck his head through the floor, since he can go through walls, doors, and floors willingly. He saw the transparent person, a ghost. A child somewhere in his teens. The boy turns to Ryan like he's something interestingly terrifying. An odd look. With one last look at the group of people down below, Ryan put himself on the floor with the boy, now on the second floor by gazing through the ceiling.

He trusts Shane and his crew, he hopes nobody is there to kick their asses.

“Hey there.” Ryan greets, standing far so that he can show he wasn't a threat. The boy was cowering into a corner, hugging himself. His body turned to a shade of purple. Apparently, the ‘poltergeist’ ghosts (he gathered the name from listening to Shane) can change shades depending on their emotion. Normal ghosts can't. “I'm not here to hurt you.”

Right now, Ryan was a lamp. He glowed in the dark, he didn't necessarily like glowing because it makes him more visible to the more threatening spirits. But being an angel doesn't come with night vision, sadly. Or maybe it does and he hasn't figured out how to enable that.

The boy looks around, searching for something. He slowly puts down his arms from hugging himself, “Y-You aren't?” Ryan shook his head. The boy doesn't move, still afraid of him. Ryan doesn't know how to get him to come closer, he doesn't want him to think of him as a threat. So, after brainstorming, he decides to extend his hand.

It was a humble invitation, he doesn't do anything else. Just a comforting look, a blast of positivity from his angelic aura. The boy seemed to relax as the aura reached him, after roughly seven seconds the boy starts to take slow hesitant steps towards him.

He places his hand into Ryan's, and he smiles with relief. It was the most purest thing Ryan has ever seen, he hugs Ryan. Sniffling. Ryan puts a hand on his back, suddenly very insecure of how he's taking care of the precious boy. He has not touched anyone or anything, at all. So this is very weird.

The boy jumps away when the door opens, revealing Shane saying a snarky comment about the demon. The co-host looks like he's about to shit himself, scolding Shane about his taunts. The co-host freezes as he steps into the room, eyes wide. “The atmosphere here is weird.” He stated. Shane hums at his comment, taking strides to the middle of the room.

The boy holds on to Ryan's arm, looking at the newcomers with his eyes bulging, he looks at Ryan with concern. “They can't be here, neither can you. Sh-She's dangerous.” He speaks in a hurry, Devon walks over to where Ryan and the boy is. Staying behind the camera man and a few other people. Her posture relaxes when she stepped beside Ryan. She mentions it to the two hosts.

Shane and the co-host have a brief chat about there being other souls here, Shane dismisses it. The co-host huffs, looking around the room. Asking questions in the open, waiting for an answer.

Ryan looks back to the boy, “Who's she?” He asks.

The boy shakes his head, his eyes full of fear. “I can't say, I can't say or she'll come. If she comes, I - We - Sh-She's going to - to..” The boy trails off into a whine, he puts his hands to his face. Leaning into Ryan's bicep. Ryan could sense the fear, and notices that it affects Devon. She shifts around from one foot to another.

Ryan glanced between the two, panicking internally. This isn't good. He needs to help the boy, he needs to calm him down. Be the Angel he's meant to be. What should he do? Little baby steps, Ryan. Little baby steps. Ryan inhales.

Ryan pulls the boy under his wing, a sign of protection and comfort. “It's okay, you don't have to say.” Ryan informs, the boy lets out a shuddering breath. The fear of being hunted down, killed off and eaten finally came to the surface. Ryan rubs circles on his back, whispering comfort. Producing positive vibes.

“Let's try the spirit box.” He hears, he turns to the co-host who suggests the idea. Mark passes the black box from a duffel bag, the co-host nods to mark as a thank you. Mark smiles back in kind. Shane's face slightly tightens at the sight of the box, he's not fond of the box. He doesn't argue, though. He never does.

The boy turns his head to the object. “Is that there to communicate with us?” Ryan nods, he's seen the sport box in action. It pierced his ears, but he was interested. He saw ghosts beside him, the ones he walked and talked with, some of their words passed through the object. Even Ryan's words got through the box, sometimes. It was hard to speak through it.

Hearing his affirmation of the box, the boy's eyes hold a new glint in them. He tugs on Ryan's forearm, nonverbally asking him to move forward. Ryan does so, he lets himself get pulled. They make their way beside the two hosts. “We need to warn them, Mr. Angel.”

Ryan was taken aback, he glances down at the boy with shocked eyes. The boy turns to him, puzzled by his shock. He knew? Wait, is it obvious? Were these dumb questions? “You know I'm an angel?” Ryan muttered, wincing after realizing how stupid he sounded. The boy only huffed a weak chuckle.

“I knew you were an angel at first. It's very obvious. But I didn't know if I was hallucinating, I didn't know if she was dressed up as one and wanted my guard down. I was afraid, but now I'm not,” He explains, his eyes drooping as he reminisces. His expression softens as he looks up at Ryan. “Not a lot of Angels come by here, some don't even get out.”

Ryan felt chills go down his spine. He was about to ask what he meant by 'some don't even get out', or why not a lot came by. Then he hears the spirit box start, loud stactic pierced the air. The boy jumps and covers his ears, Ryan rubbed circles on his back. He was used to the box turning on.

The co-host waits, then speaks. “Is there anyone here?” Ryan opened his mouth to confirm, but the boy was quick as opened his mouth. Straight to the point.

“You can't –”

**“ – ßꍟ ꃅ ꍟ ꋪ ꍟ. ”**

The boy tilted his head, a look of perplexed surprise. His voice came out differently, a slightly deeper voice. He looks up at Ryan with a question mark, Ryan lifts his hand towards the spirit box. “The box is a bit rusty, but it [.. **ꅏꂦꋪꀘꌗ ꈤꂦꈤƬꃅꍟ꒒ꍟꌗꌗ.** ]” Ryan holds a hand to his mouth, a bit shocked. He looks at the box with surprise. It wasn't his voice that passed through, but the words did. The boy stifled a laugh at his expression. 

Meanwhile, the co-host looks like he's about to shit himself. He stares at Shane wide-eyed, he repeats the four words that were able to pass through, “'Be here', 'works nonetheless'?”

Shane shares a glance with his co-host, then shifts his attention to the box. “Lots o' chatter, I hear. Very chatty.” He speaks, there was static. Empty static. He dislikes using the damn thing, but if it won't work? Even worse. Shane eyes the box, then his surroundings.

The co-host takes a time to breathe. “I'm Marlon,” He turns to the tall man next to him. “That's Shane. Can you say our names back to us?”

Ryan was going to, but then restrained. He needed to protect them, not answer questions. He raises his guard up, sensing for any danger lurking in the shadows. Seeing this, the boy spoke for the both of them. He decided to go with smaller words.

**“ ꒒ꍟꍏᐯꍟ . ”**

Marlon's eyes could not possibly be any bigger, he still kept it down. It reminded Shane of someone, he tried to bury the thought before it could get any bigger. Marlon glanced around nervously, his hand tightened around the box for comfort. “Why do we need to leave?”

Ryan's heart banged against his chest, he felt something. He sensed something, it brought back to the same sensation he felt when he was in Buzzfeed, when he was out doing in own stuff. It was an intimidating, strong and foul aura. It was lurking somewhere, it wasn't close, but it also wasn't far.

Somewhere in his mind, his Angel Instincts kicked in; reacting to the dark aura. Whispering to him urgently about _protect-save-shield-rescue_ , it didn't at all soothe him or help keep him calm. He looks toward the spirit box.

 **“ ꀭꀎꌗƬ ꁅꂦ! ”** He urged, taking a step forward. This was suddenly becoming both pressuring and frustrating, Ryan felt like he could explode from all the anxiousness that rattled inside him. The boy tugs on his shirt, Ryan turns his head to look at him.

The boy clings to Ryan, “She's coming, i-isn't she?” His voice quivers. The outline of his silhouette turning into a dark purple, he was shaking. Ryan impulsively brought him into a hug, wrapping his wings around the boy. He did not want him to be afraid, not now, this was not the dang time. Even though Ryan himself was afraid, he didn't want another to be the same.

Ryan pats his head, he turns his head to glance at the crew. “I think we should go, seriously. I'm not even doing this out of fear anymore.” Marlon speaks, sharing glances with the crew and Shane.

The lanky man moves forward to pat his back, his face did show a disturbed look.  He morphs it into a comforting one, bringing his face into Marlon vision. “We'll do one more room, then we'll go.” He speaks. Unbeknownst to them, an angel is having on the verge of a panic attack.

The presence is getting closer, Ryan's heart couldn't calm down anymore. “No!” The boy yells, frustration evident in his tone. His face turning helpless when he realized his voice didn't go through. Ryan pulled away from the hug, his instincts screamed to do something.

“The [ **-..ꀸꍟꎭꂦꈤ ꀤꌗ ꉓꂦꎭꀤꈤꁅ..-** ] you fools! Please just [.. **꒒ꍟꍏᐯꍟ!** ]!” The boy tried again, his eyes watering. His body shook with fear, his hands curling into a fist. Why couldn't they just leave?

The boy's mind was convulsing with overwhelming dread. He watched the angel's eyes spark into a glowing white, there was no white or black, no sclera or pupil. Everything was plain white. He charged into the other room, his hands glowing. As he does so, the boy's body tensed as he hears a scratchy snarl from the other side.

That was her. She's here, and she's gonna tear the boy apart. Just like she did with the rest of them, she didn't find any use of them anymore. She was the original owner, she did lots of diabolical actions and things. The other ghosts, the ghosts that used to exist beside him, were the next owners.

She drove them to insanity. Trapping them in the house when they decide to move out, when she had enough power, she would turn them against each other if there were more than two. When the inevitable happened, death, she would crown them as her servants. Now, she didn't need them anymore. She hunted them down one by one. The boy had someone else around, he doesn't think they're here anymore.

The boy watched the crew decide to finally just leave, luckily the fight Ryan and the demon had was in the other room. The group didn't go where they are, they retraced their steps. The boy watched them exit to the other room, his head turned to the door where all the ruckus is.

He slowly makes his way there, his little head peaking through.

He saw pools of gold and black blood, he saw hexes and magic go head-to-head. The two deities circling each other as they fought like a dance, a very chaotic dance at that. The room was shaking. Cuts and bruises on both bodies, both glared at each other as they pounced once again.

The fight went on so, so long. Yet went by so, so fast.

There was a moment where the angel was pinned to the floor, being punched mercilessly by the other, a sneer was worn by the woman. The angel's nose bled as he does so. “Stupid. Little–” The woman wasn't able to finish her words as Ryan blasts a beam of light through her chest, sending her to the ceiling then back to the floor as she screams. He doesn't even know how the heck he did it, but he's thankful.

“You fucking bitch!” The woman screeches, holding her chest with her one hand on the ground. Pitch black eyes, it was like the angel's, no sclera or a distinctive pupil, just one colour. Ryan stands up, ignoring the spike of pain that went up his spine. He needs a rest after this.

Ryan was somewhat present in his mind, more-or-less it was just him following what his Angel Instincts want him to do. He was mildly afraid and was about to curl up into a ball, or book it out the door any time. But his instincts screamed the same protect-save-shield-rescue, he raised his hands and said: ' _screw it_ ' and fought the demon.

The angel did finger guns, “I ain't no bitch, snitch.” Ryan regretted saying that, it wasn't at all necessary and was just stupid.

The woman slowly stood up, curving her body into a position where it was ready to pounce. Ryan tried to do certain hand movements, sweat pouring down like Niagara Falls was on double time. He watches the woman fly towards him, he closes his eyes as he awaits the impact. A shriek coming from the woman that quickly faded away.

When nothing happened for a couple seconds, he opened one of his eyes. He sees faint red particles, dissipating into the air. The woman was nowhere to be found. Taking a sigh of relief. Ryan nearly collapsed on the floor, and slept then and there. 

He looks at his two palms, both covered in icky thick black blood. He makes a disgusted face at the sight, his clothes were covered in it. He hears light footsteps and jumps, quickly glancing where the sound came from.

He holds a hand to his chest. “Oh, oh my goodness. Jeez – You scared me.” He speaks, the boy looks him up and down. Eyes concerned and helpless. Ryan glanced elsewhere before returning his gaze to the kid. What does a person do when they're covered in blood, hurt and scathed, and totally murdered someone.

He extends his arms awkwardly. “..Hug?”

The boy pursed his lips, he shakes his head. “That's fair.” Ryan agreed, letting his arms fall back to his sides. The boy looked at him with a sea of emotion, speechless. This is probably going to be added to his list of scarring and 'seen some things'. Poor kid, he didn't deserve it.

Ryan was about to break the silence, however, the boy had spoken first. “You did it.” He breathed.

Ryan grinned, “You bet I did.” The boy smiled, Ryan's grin dropped when he saw tears that came from his eyes. He came closer, he reached his hand out to wipe it. He stopped halfway, seeing the liquid on his hands. He assumed the boy didn't want blood on his cheek, so he didn't do anything about it.

“Hey, why're you crying little guy?” He asked.

The boy sniffed, he wiped away the tears with his arm. “Mr. Angel, does this mean I get to.. to go?”

Ryan tilts his head. He straightens his posture. To go? “What do you mean?”

The boy gestured to him, then to himself. Trying to portray what he meant, he raised his hand to wipe away more tears of joy. “You know, be at rest?” Ryan's eyes widened in realization, his lips slowly curled upwards. Oh, _that_ to go.

“I guess, yeah. Do you want me to..?”

The boy nods vigorously, eager to go somewhere safer. Somewhere better, incredible and comforting. He hopes the other people are already there, the people that got hunted down by the fiend that kept them trapped here.

Ryan nods, his hands moving. It took a few tries, but the boy dissipated with a bright smile. Ryan returned it, waving a goodbye.

He did good.

After ten or so minutes, Ryan blinked. Realizing where he is, what he did, 

 

* * *

 

Ryan throws himself on to Shane's couch, he managed to clean himself. Remember how he could create items out of thin air? Well, even though Ryan knew there was a limit to it, he tried to see if he could summon soap and a basin. Surprisingly, Ryan can summon soap. But not the basin. It sucks.

When Shane wasn't near the bathroom, he flung his top to the sink in the bathroom and did his hardest to turn the water on. Multiple tries ensued. Many grunts of frustration, it was good time. He did manage to twist the knob on the sink, he rejoiced and was able to scrub the dried blood stains. It was the panic when he realized he needed to turn it off.

Good times.

So, the angel may be somewhat wet. Not entirely wet, but moist. That's what she said. Ryan rolls his eyes, he shifts himself to lay on his back. His eyes roam around for Shane subconsciously, instead, he finds Sara. A woman who's pretty sweet and tender. Ryan was sure she was an angel.

“Hey, Sara.” He greets tiredly. The woman doesn't acknowledge him, as usual. She sips on her coffee, staring at her phone. Ryan chuckles to himself, “I'm a crazy person,” He whispered, then burst into a fit of giggles. He is a crazy person. Who whispers to themselves? Ryan does, apparently. Someone help him.

His laughter dies down, it's quiet all over again. His lips slowly straighten as he recalls the rough fight, his heart was beating so damn fast. He remembered thinking to himself a mixture of _this might as well happen_ and _oh god I'm gonna die oh no no no_ with a dash of _I can do this!_ ..lots of chaos happened.

And then the spell he did to the demon, how did he do that? It oddly felt natural. Then again, he did succumb to his angelic instincts. Whatever he did, he hoped that woman is kept somewhere far, far away. Where she can't hurt anyone.

Ryan's eyes slowly shut due to fatigue, he turns his head towards the couch as he embraces the dark. His mind lulling itself to sleep. Tomorrow is gonna be a good day.

“Sara!”

“Yes, tall dork?”

“Can you give me my towel? It's in the drawer in my room.”

Ryan hears someone shuffle around along with a door opening.

“On it, sasquatch!”

“Thank you, gremlin!”

 

..Tomorrow will definitely be a good day, he just knows it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this did not go the way I expected it to go. BUT OKAY -  
> the mansion isn't a real thing, hopefully. I just thought of it. Marlon was a lil' person I made up, if you're name is Marlon. Hii,,
> 
> I hope you enjoyed!


	5. taste the foul with the rocks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It wasn't Shane's day, week, or month before. And boy, it isn't going to change any time soon.
> 
> “G'night, y'all.”

Ryan's eyes open, he takes a moment to take in where he was. He sat himself up slowly, his bones slightly stiff. He stretches his arms as he yawns, hearing a few bones pop. Sleeping on the couch wasn't good on his back. But he didn't care, what was done is done. He can't change the past.

He hears two people chattering, he turns his head to the source of the noise. Obviously, it's just Sara and Shane. He smiles as he thinks of the two, they are such a sweet couple. Two goofs in love. 

He gets up from the couch and stretches, he then moves his shoulders in a circular motion. He might as well check up on them. Ryan makes his way towards the kitchen, fazing through doors and some furniture. Once he's arrived, he crosses his arms and leans against the wall. Ryan observes the two with delight.

Sara was making pancakes while Shane sat down at the table with a mug full of coffee in his hands. He had his head down, eyes distant. “Nothing happened at all yesterday, then?” Sara asked, getting a spatula to flip the pancakes. Her head turned slightly to look over her shoulder. She already knew the answer, but she wants to talk with him more. He barely spoke, or initiated a conversation.

Shane rolls his eyes. “Nothing ever happens, just a few noises.” He takes a sip out of his coffee, his gaze rests on the top of the table. Sara hums as she nods.

It was silent for another minute before someone speaks up again.

“How about that meeting with Steven?” Sara prepares two plates on the counter beside beside her, the clinking sound barely saved Shane from zoning out. “You know, hanging out, you and him. Did you think of saying yes after thinking it over?” Sara continues. She had placed two pancakes so far on one plate.

Shane pursed his lips. “Yeah.” 

Sara placed another pair of pancakes onto another plate, she walks over to the table and places them both down. The sound when the two items collide occupy the air. Shane pushes his chair forward, he straightens his posture and puts his mug down.

Sara goes to the drawers to get utensils, she places them down beside the plate. She takes her seat across from Shane. Her eyes glance up and down at the man in front of her, looking for anything that she could lift up. She looked at his plate, she felt like she was missing something.

The moment Shane picks up his fork and knife, she raises her voice, “Do you want some syrup with that?” Sara suggests, raising her palm. Shane glances up at her, he shrugs and nudges the plate towards her. “Sure.”

Sara grabs his plate and places it on the counter, she opens a few cupboards before pausing. “Honey or chocolate?” Sara looks over her shoulder.

“Any is fine.” He replies with a shrug, his eyes fixated on the table. His hands play with the fork and knife.

Sara exhales through her nose, she nods and gets the honey. She was lucky that she managed to grab it, she thought she needed a chair. She pours the condiment on the pancake, then places it back into the cupboards. Sara carries the plate back to Shane with a smile, Shane struggles to return it. “Here you go.”

“Thank you.”

Sara doesn't move. She stays put near Shane, who cuts his pancake into a suitable piece for eating before taking a bite. As he munches on his food, he turns his head to look at Sara. He blinks in surprise before raising a hand to wave awkwardly.

Sara's face had a tint of sadness, she places a hand on his shoulder. “You know I'm here for you, right?” Shane doesn't reply, the expression on Sara ached his heart. He didn't like being the cause of a gloomy look, he wasn't all about that at all. “If you ever need anyone to talk to, or to vent about your feelings about what happened. I'm here.”

Sara squeezes his shoulder tenderly before leaning down to plant a kiss on his cheek, she makes her way to the other side. Shane doesn't say anything, his expression was indecipherable. His eyes, on the other hand, show guilt and slight shame.

She shows a comforting smile before digging in. Shane eats slowly, mostly picking at his food. He eats nonetheless.

Ryan's gaze flickered between the two. He doesn't know if he should use his ability, or let the tense atmosphere be. Everything goes through tough times in order to get to the good times, or quarrel to make up and be stronger. 

His palms itch with energy. He bites his cheek, he abstains from doing anything.

Nobody spoke up during breakfast. It was tense and awkward, Shane had finished one and a half of his food before getting up and placing it in the sink. Ryan takes a deep breath.

Everything is going to be fine.

 

* * *

 

The drive to work was alright. There was funky music playing in the background, Shane was head bobbing to the beat of it. Ryan joined in midway. He figured it would've been fun, and it was. They probably looked like idiots. Well, Shane looked like an idiot. Ryan can say all that much, nobody can see the angel so obviously he's not looking like an idiot. Case closed.

Shane was finishing up a Spice Girls song when he pulled over in the parking lot. Ryan was wheezing when he first heard him start, then he started doing it more and more passionately. That was when Ryan started to laugh his ass off hysterically.

Shane walked into the building and went to his usual place. Ryan was about to follow, but then a glimpse of something black caught the corners of his eye. He swiftly turned his head to the side, raising an eyebrow. Nothing was there.

He slowly faced forward, his eyes lingering before looking in front of him. He followed Shane quickly. The tall bloke greeted various of people before getting to his desk, a big round yellow sticker with his name on it.

Ryan doesn't plan on going anywhere, he's already explored enough. He might as well observe the damn guy. He summons his little cloud to sit on, hovering in between Shane and an empty chair beside him. He leans forward with interest as the computer starts.

Shane as odd, questionable videos playing in the background. Ryan can't hear them because Shane wears headphones. Like, there was one video where it was a yellow person-thing in square pants and a pink star man. Then there were videos about cats doing weird crap? Jeez, Shane. Ryan doesn't question it, though.

Suddenly, the hours go by like he was in a daze. It's lunch time, and Shane gets up from his chair. Saving his progress on editing the newest video on Unsolved. He turns off his computer and walks away, the angel gets off from his cloud and runs to catch up.

“This day has been quite eventful, huh Shane?” Ryan joked, jabbing an elbow at the man's ribs. “Gosh, exhaustion is just taking over me.” Ryan continued, following Shane to the food place. Food displayed on tables, pizza, drinks, salad. It's kind of cool. If only Ryan could grab one.

Shane of–flipping–course goes for the carrot and pizza. Ryan crosses his arms, amusement on his face as he watched. He lets his eyes loom over the table full of fare, he sees a familiar man across him. What was it, Steven? Ryan believes that he was the man that Shane has met yesterday.

Another man is beside him, blonde with a pretty face. Ryan tilts his head as he watches the two. Said duo bicker about what food they want.

Steven points at the one pizza box that was miraculously unopened, “We should steal that one before someone gets it,” The blonde man beside him rolls his eyes, nomming away at his burger. “Come on, Andrew. Nobody will notice – ” Steven stops, realizing that somebody had opened the box and stole a three pizza slices from within.

He recoils his pointing hand to his side with a huff. “Aww. Andrew, man, we missed our perfect chance. But! No worries, we always have tomorrow.” Andrew snickers, he tugs on Steven's shirt to flee the table. Steven obliges after stealing another drink and another burger.

Ryan pursed his lips. Andrew, Steven. At this point, Ryan has given up trying to make theories as to why he feels overwhelmingly familiar to certain people. He's just raising question marks without fully-pledged out existential crisis questions. He had enough of those.

Ryan turns to his side to where a tall noodle is supposed to be, Ryan's eyes bulged out like plates when he realized who was missing. He shoots up near the ceiling to take an overview of the people, he's a tall guy, he can't be that difficult to find.

Took him about three hours.

He found him in a lone room, somewhere where nobody was in. Only him, his phone, his food and himself. Ryan narrows his eyes as he stalks closer, he sees the man scrolling through silly images of himself and someone who looks almost parallel to the angel beside him.

A part of Ryan feels sorrow and sympathy for Shane. He's alone, he doesn't have anyone. Not even Ryan could be considered as someone, he's not visible. To Shane, he's all alone. It was saddening. He deflects that part of him quickly, instead, he opens his mouth to speak.

He hears a door opening and Ryan could've flown to the other goddamn room, he holds a hand to hold his fast thumping heart. “Holy–”

“Shane!” A voice calls, Shane looks up attentively. “There you are! I've been looking everywhere for you, man. Is this where you've been all this time?”

Steven and Andrew, mainly Steven, come sprinting down from the door to Shane. They stand in front of Shane. A look of relief, Steven speaks. “Are you still coming to meet us up at the park?” Steven proposes once more, a hopeful expression on his face. Andrew takes a sip of what appears to be water as he waits.

Shane looks over at Ryan's direction and the angel freezes, his face had a look of someone silently pleading for help. But that was something Shane did often, kind of. If Ryan didn't know any better, he'd say Shane saw him. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

Shane pursed his lips. He nods, “Yeah, sure, what time?”

Steven's smile was so bright, he might as well be the son of the sun.

He clasped his hands together, “I was thinking tomorrow, somewhere around ten, or in the evening, maybe?” Steven suggests, Andrew rolls his eyes at Steven's anxious tone. 

Shane shrugs, he gives a lazy smile. “You can just text me.”

Steven nods, “alright, that's cool with me,” he agrees. “Do you want to meet outside Buzzfeed?”

Why the heck not. Shane nods, Steven beams at his answer. He waves goodbye to leave, Andrew gives him a nod as his goodbye. Shane sighs, he glances at his food without the empty feeling in his stomach. He's not hungry anymore. But it's a shame to waste food, so he attempts to wolf down the last two and a half piece of his pizza by shoving it all in his mouth.

Ryan wheezed, hard. Coincidentally, Shane paused gobbling down his pizza like a maniac, his head perked up in alert. Ryan struggled to tone down his wheezes, doubling over. It stops abruptly when he saw that Shane left his last slice down in the almost empty pizza box and makes a beeline for the exit, carrying the cardboard box with him and dumping it into the bin nearest to him.

Ryan was quick to follow. As always. Shane was back to sitting down in his desk. Lunch is over, boohoo. Ryan crosses his arms and observes. He looks up and decides, why not count the computers?

So he stands up and starts pointing, grunting when realizing he lost his will to count and needing to redo it all.

Fun times.

 

* * *

 

Shane keeps going to different places, as if to distract himself. It works for a little while, he went to many different places; the mall, the park, the Starbucks store again, walking around the block, went to a food place, the park again, then he crosses the familiar hospital Ryan assumed he was birthed in.

Shane pauses, he stands across the hospital. Staring at it with a sea of emotions. Ryan stands close, gazing at the familiar building.

Ah, the hospital.

The day he was greatly confused, surprised, and basically adapted to the being he is. Oh, it was just a wonderful day. To top it off, he met Shane. The peculiar special case. Then Ryan attached himself to him, he didn't know why. But he assumes it's because of his angel instincts, as usual. Nothing more. 

It was a wonderful day.

Shane's eyes darkened at the sight of the white building. It insinuated that Shane couldn't say the same.

Ryan tilts his head, he watches Shane carefully. Why was that so? He didn't know. Shane quickly disregarded the fact he acknowledged the enormous building, he walked away hastily. He acted like his reaction was nothing.

Ryan caught up to his pace, his long legs carried him for miles even with one step. “Hey,” He started, concerned. “You okay, dude?” –.. _I_ _mean, I know you can't hear me or anything. But I'd like to know_. Was what he wanted to finish with, but he if he did he wouldn't only feel like an idiot, but a lonesome one. He didn't want that, was that selfish?

Shane didn't say anything, of course. He couldn't see or hear him.

They simply walked together with deafening silence that couldn't be broken.

 

**//**

 

Shane kept himself occupied, every now and then checking his phone in case he missed a text. It was good that he was walking around. Yet, it seemed like his mind was elsewhere half the time. Ryan tried to not think of it too much.

He walked on the outskirts of forests, he visited another park, he did whatever he felt obligated to do. Wherever he went, Ryan would follow.

As Shane ambled through the park, Ryan's eyes fixated on a big dog up ahead, his eyes elated with enthusiatic curiosity. “A pupper!” Ryan exclaimed, he drifted over with the power of his feathery wings. Shane was going to catch up, after all, it was only a few feet in front of him.

“Hello there, furry boy.” Ryan greeted, bending over.

Unexpectedly, the dog looked up at him and barked.

Ryan shrieked and jumped away, the dog barked and tried to follow. His leash restrained him from doing so.

Shane's head shot upward at the sudden sound. He didn't jump or flinch, though. His gaze centralized itself on the four-legged mammal, it looked pure and lovely. Adorable, too. The owner looked at him with a sheepish face, “Ah, pardon me. Barnabel gets excited easily.” The person apologized, Shane tittered and told him it was fine. He walked closer to the man so that he wasn't so far.

They both looked at the dog, barking at thin air. “What dog is he?” Shane asked, internally screaming at the wrong usage of terms. He hoped the owner didn't mind. Goodness, socializing with other people other than Sara was weird.

They didn't judge him, instead they smiled in amusement. “Saint Bernard, nine months old.” They replied before whistling, “Barnabel! C'mere doggo, we have to go to Debby's house. We can't be late, pupper.” Still, the dog barked. He did go closer to his (or her) owner though.

Shane nodded, “He seems lovely.”

“She. But yeah, I agree – come on, girl – she's very active and playful. Sometimes when we go on walks around the park, we would try to out-run each other.” The person informed with a chuckle.

The dog finally stopped barking, she gaze moving to the tree. With one final bark, she turns around. She pants with a smile, the owner crouches down and gives her a rub. Shane's lips slowly curved upwards. The owner looks to him and stands up, their hands gestured to the dog. “Do you want to pet?”

Shane raised his hands. “Tempting, but no. You have places to be, right? I don't want to stop you anymore than I already have on your quest, good sir.”

The owner snickered. “If you say so. We'll be off, have a nice day.”

Shane nodded as his goodbye. The two now walking in opposite directions. That went well.

Meanwhile, Ryan is hiding in the tree while holding a branch for dear life.

 

  **//**

 

Shane's journey finally ended at Starbucks. He totally walked there on his own two feet, totally didn't drive a car there, he did it on his own. Yep, no driving here. He walked here like a man. He wasn't standing in a parking lot because of a car, no. Nada.

Shane clicked on a button on his key, a beeping noise came from a vehicle not too far away from him. Locked.

Ryan scoffed playfully, rolling his eyes. “Idiot.” He couldn't blame him, though.

Shane made his way into the store, ordered and paid for a drink and sat down. He took out his phone and watched some videos as he awaited for his coffee to cool. Ryan sat next of him, his eyes roamed around the place. He sees a lot of smiling people talking, most of it was plain gossip or talking about nothing.

Shane puts down his phone upside down on the table and relaxes into the chair. His hands creep up to the cup, he lifts it to drink.

 _..Bzzt_!

Ryan looked up, hearing a noise. He stared at Shane, searching for any sign of disturbance. When he saw nothing, he shook it off and carried on counting the lines on his palms.

_..Bzzzt!_

Ryan looked up again skeptically, he looks at the man with espy. Why did he make a vibrating noise? And how did he do it? He stares at Shane with suspicion, and finally he moves. His hands reach for the phone to flip it in to its back. The angel deadpanned.

Of course it was the phone.

The black screen turned on, and two messages were seen.

 

**[steven]**

_> hey hey hey guess who it is?_

_> it's me, ya boy (see what I did there?)_

 

Shane rolled his eyes and began typing. Ryan leaned in closer to see more, he was quite curious. How the heck did Steven whats-his-name get into his phone? He probably isn't in the phone, though. He would've called for help and shrieked in fear.

 

**[you]**

_> har har._

 

**[steven]**

_> come on, it was funny,,_

_> anyways, i textend not because of our meet up or anything i just wanted to send you something_

 

**[you]**

_> textend?_

_> Ah, yes. the mighty way of textending your friend. amazing._

 

**[steven]**

_> texted*_

_> you know what i mean >://_

_> here's the thing I wanted to send hope you like it, Andrew sent it to me so if anything makes you feel like, odd,, blame him_

_ { Steven Sent an Attachment . }_

 

Ryan watched Shane hestitate to tap on the ‘Attachment’. Ryan leans in closer, his shoulder slightly fazing through the tip of Shane's side. Shane taps on it.

A video plays.

It was a very, very strange video.

Obviously, there was a ton of humour crammed in there. It was a compilation of many videos. Shane and Ryan laughed, some of it was short but hilarious. It was silly, but it was fun. Attachments are fun. This is fun. Ryan felt his lungs tighten as he laughed, he was wheezing yet again.

When the video finished, Shane typed to Steven (who Ryan still doesn't know is the phone or the phone has some connections to him and is a form of messenging.) a little ‘ _lol thanks fam_ ’.

Shane tucked his phone into his pocket, grabbed his half-empty coffee cup with a misspelled version of his name and left. Ryan soon followed behind, though he was confused. What did lol mean?

 

**//**

 

The next day; Shane went out for work, as usual. Ryan followed him, as usual. Everything was fine. The day yesterday was pretty fine. Nothing special happened, Shane was slowly getting better. Ryan's Blob Vision could never fail him, he saw the edges of Shane's huge tornado blob-light shrinking inch-by-inch every day. It wasn't fast, but it was good enough.

As of now, Shane was waiting for the traffic light to turn green on his lane.

“Hmm,” The angel hummed in the other's car, sitting in the passenger seat. “You doing good?” He asked, tilting his head to the side slightly. His eyes gazed over at Shane's face, a spark of warmth flickers in his chest.

Shane leaned into his chair and sighed, his hands losing their grip on the wheel. “This is boring.” He muttered. “I would rather get hit by a car than this,” He squints his eyes. “Actually, I'd rather not.”

Ryan cackled, “I take it that you're not doing so good, then.”

Shane moved his hand forward to press on the button that changes the music, he went flipped four or five times before he settled on the sixth. Ryan checked the title. ‘Fly Me To The Moon – Frank Sinatra’. Ryan nods in acknowledgement before looking away, okay then. The song was nice.

The songs he listened to in Shane's car whenever he drive to work was nice, a bit crazy sometimes but he didn't care. Shane was enjoying himself. He liked music, it seemed to lull him into some sort of calmness. Or excitement, depending on the song's tone.

Ryan learnt he liked seeing Shane go ham in lip-syncing or singing to the tune of the music. The passion on his face, the way he rocks his upper body, the tapping of his feet beside the pedals down below. It was contagious, Ryan would dance in when he could. Smiling wide.

Ryan then thought, why would a guy like Shane be so tormented in his own thoughts? Shane was amazing at controlling his emotions, even if he produced them oddly. He was self-aware of himself. He wondered what caused him to weep when he was alone.

Ryan thought back to the time when Shane walked down the pavement, the day they met. He looked so sad. And not to mention how devastated he felt, the anguish and agony. What happened to him? Shane didn't deserve that. Shane didn't deserve pain.

His mind flashed to the time when Shane's eyes darkened at the sight of the hospital. Ryan's eyebrows arched slightly, did something happened at the hospital? Ryan stared at the sky, tuning out Shane's faint singing-whispers beside him. Ryan's eyes widened slightly in realization.

He remembers Shane's conversation with Zach, something about somebody's death. Ryan completely forgot about that, he was so caught up with Shane. He turns his head to stare at Shane with sadness.

Ryan wished he was here. He wished he could help this poor tall child, or be there to double his happiness. Instead, he was here being useless. He couldn't do anything but stand on the sidelines, he was so close yet so far.

Shane was beauty, Shane was grace, his internal grief deserved a mace to the face.

Snapping back into reality, he sees Shane prepare himself as he sees the light turn orange. The smile on his face slowly dissipated, his lips slowly bent themselves into a straight line. Those damn lips. Stupid, pretty, wonderful lips. Ryan sighed, his heart fluttering. He ignored it by looking elsewhere, the heat in his face didn't go away. It'll leave.

Whatever Shane is going through, Ryan will be there to support. Wherever the man goes, the angel goes. Ryan would do anything for Shane. If he could, he would give gifts to Shane and won't expect anything in return. Would Shane like that?

The green traffic light turns on.

 

**//**

 

Shane work was the same. Sitting in a chair, except he was asked if he could star in a video idea. He said yes, and Ryan follows him to the shoot. There was camera crews and everything, Ryan stood somewhere in the back to watch. He sat next beside another person, a woman. She had long blonde hair and had blue eyes.

The two greeted each other before having a brief chat with the people who wasn't in the scene. They first tried to get a spoiler as to what they were doing, the people didn't give any hints.

Ryan hummed as he waited.

“..AAand, action!” The man behind the camera exclaimed, clapping his hand.

A woman somewhere behind the camera began to speak, “Okay so, we bought you both here today to do a challenge.” The blonde woman nods, Shane waits patiently. They're eyes get dragged to a computer, the blonde woman perks up. Looking at the camera then to the people behind it, “Are we playing a game while doing the challenge?” She asked.

“A game challenge?” Shane comments.

The blonde woman nods, “Yeah. I'm currently doing one, actually. The one hundred baby challenge in the Sims. It's horrific.”

Shane let out a dry chuckle, nobody paid attention to it. “That's a thing? Good riddance, people are crazy.” The woman laughs.

“No games, try again.” The woman behind the camera asserted, amusement in her tone as she rolls her eyes.

Shane looks up, as if to think. His eyes spark as a lightbulb goes off, before he could speak, the blonde woman was already talking. “Oh! Oo! Is it one of those challenges where we react to a video?” She suggests.

Shane slumps in his chair, “D'oh, I was about to say that.” He remarked, a dramatic sense of defeat.

A thumbs up comes from behind and her face lights up, signaling to whoever watches this that she was correct.

“Try not to laugh, the rules are simple. Don't laugh.”

The blonde woman covers her mouth as her shoulders shook, “Oh, shit. I can't do this.” The blonde whispered, just about squelching back the laugh in her throat. Shane chortled, he turns to the woman with a hint of amusement.

“You up to the challenge, Impicciche?”

That's one hell of a name, Ryan noted.

Impicciche scoffed playfully, “Am I up to the challenge?” She laughed, before morphing her face into a serious one. “ _No_.” She stated. Nobody spoke after a few seconds, a pin drop could be heard if you listened carefully. Then, the room laughed. Her and Shane's face breaking into grins.

Shane shakes his head, “The challenge hadn't even started. Dammit, Kelsey.”

“It's not just you two sitting in front of a computer,” A man spoke, the two stare at him with interest. Shane leans into his chair as he sees two plates full of yummy, mouthwatering, delicious food. It even smelled great, is this the catch? “There is a challenge in the challenge.”

Kelsey gasps. Shane simply blinks, waiting.

“After reacting to a video our staff suggested, you can take a bite of the food. But, if you laughed. You can't eat the food you see here.” The man explained.

Shane raised a palm, as if to halt what's going on. “Wait, wait. So you're telling us that if one of us laughs and the other doesn't, we have to watch them eat this holy food?” The people behind the camera smiles innocently, a couple shrugging and nodding.

Someone comes in to turn on the computer and press on a playlist made specifically for them, and the challenge starts.

It was hil-flipping-larious.

Everytime Ryan wheezed or cackled, positivity rises. Which means the atmosphere grew more prone to laughter. Which didn't at all help Shane and Kelsey, every time one one of them didn't laugh, they watch either with sad puppy eyes or taunt the other as they took a bite. When they both didn't laugh, they congratulate each other and clink the piece of food in their utensils as they ate.

( “Clinkies!” They two exclaimed in a high pitched voice at the same time, then turned away as they struggled to choke back a laugh. “That was stupid.” Shane mumbled, Kelsey nodded. )

The whole thing was gelastic with these two, their platonic chemistry was pretty nice. Sometimes, Shane would point at the computer and say: “That's what Sim Steven feels in the basement.” Which was horribly cryptic and ominous, Ryan was actually concerned.

The video was over and another two came along to do the same thing.

 

**//**

 

As Shane's day went on, Ryan saw other people walk around the building with questions. Or asking if they could join in a video. Ryan was so, so curious on what video idea they're doing. He wanted to follow them. But he refrained, he needed to stay by Shane's side. It was tempting, though.

Then, lunch came around. Steven came to swing by, “Shane. Can we meet at Chick-Fil-A?” Steven asked, Shane agreed. Steven stayed to chat, mostly about Andrew and some guy named Adam. And also about random crap, like if they could taste air. Shane never looked so done with anybody. 

He left when Andrew came by to steal him. Now Shane, realistically, is all on his own. He went back to work with a bowl of spaghetti in front of him. Ryan shook his head with a smile he tried to keep down. Of course. Shane, of course.

Work was over, and Shane stood up. At the same time that happened, Ryan saw a glint of black in the corner of his eyes. Turning his head, he saw nothing there. Ryan shook his head and looked at Shane.

Shane was seven feet away from the exit when a silver-haired man followed by a blonde and a brown, bearded man came along. Steven, Steven's boyfriend one and two. Ryan snickered at his joke.

Shane turns around when he felt a hand on his shoulder, he was greeted with smiles. They continued to walk, exiting the building. They didn't converse on a specific topic, they went from one subject to another.

Ryan walked behind all of them, watching with content. He liked this. This was nice.

Shane decided to take the lead and went ahead of the three, a prideful look on his face as he replied to Adam's response to his pun about dams, Ryan would've laughed if it weren't for everything falling silent. The loud ringing of white noise in his ears.

“Shane!” One of them called worriedly.

Shane turned around, eyes filled with pure confusion. Why were the other three not beside him? He looked down to see where he was standing. Other people looked at him with shock. Ryan's eyes were wide, he couldn't move. Everything sounded like it was underwater. There was a loud blare of a horn.

“ _The truck_!”

Shane's eyes grow wide, looking to the side. He could see two bright lights barreling towards him, everything tensed and all he could feel was fear as he rose his arms to protect himself even though he should've moved and —

Ryan held his breath, covering his mouth with his hands.

He heard the three of them call out the man's name before it happened. But Ryan couldn't hear it; every scream, every shocked voice and murmur sounded muffled. His brain was malfunctioning and he couldn't process anything.

Ryan couldn't hear Steven anxiously fumbling to call the ambulance, he couldn't hear Adam's worried curse as he ran to Shane. Trying to keep him awake, trying to save him.

When he felt himself enter reality, he walked towards Shane. He reached out a hand to touch, but he struggled. He couldn't believe this. He couldn't. The upcoming tears were blurring his vision, his hands felt cold and his heart missed so many beats.

He blinked, trying to use the Blob Vision to see if he can detect anything. But that torment of a blob-light wasn't there, it wasn't present. Instead, it was fading on it's owner. He blinked again and everything was normal. Normal except for Shane.

Ryan whimpered, he tried his best to keep Shane going. His eyes were slowly starting to close, his eyes were glassy and _god_  Shane looked terrible.

A burly man came out with a worried face, he paled when he saw Shane. “O-Oh my god, I'm so sorry! I - I didn't mean to — ” The blonde man, Andrew, came by and silenced him and told him it was okay. Even though it really fucking wasn't. Everything was going wrong and horrible.

Andrew kneeled next to the man who started to bleed, “Shane, I want you to listen to me.” Andrew stated, holding his hand. Adam was holding Shane's other hand in a tight grip, Shane tried to hold tight back. But everything was just so numb, and the ringing was too loud. His consciousness was failing to stay awake. “Breathe, okay? Don't die on us.” 

Shane tried to breathe, instead he coughed out blood. Everything was dizzy, was he dying? Probably. “Shit, shit,”  Adam swore. “The ambulance is coming, just don't close your eyes, Shane. Don't close them.”

 _But I want to_ , Shane wanted to protest. He bit his tongue instead, everything was too loud. He was starting to droop from the lack of blood flow. From his weak face, Ryan felt tears piling. Shane opened his mouth, he wanted to say something at least. His final words.

“Dying is–” Shane gurgled and hacked, “–Dying isn't what I expected.”

Adam tried to tell him to stop talking, and tell him to relax. Tell him that he shouldn't close his eyes, he couldn't close his eyes.

Then he smiled, his stupid, amazing smile. And the weak light in his eyes. Shane had the fucking nerve to smile at a time like this. The sight broke Ryan, spiraling him into a whirl of tears and overwhelming emotions.

Ryan held a hand to caress his cold face. “Sh-Shane..” He sobbed.

Shane's eyes glossed over at Ryan, his eyes widening. That was when every fibre of Ryan's being collapsed. He could see him. Shane can _see_ him, but it was at _such_ a terrible time Ryan wanted to cry more than he already had. Shane's weak smile grew as he stared. So many words to say, but he couldn't even make a sound.

It turned sad as his eyes fluttered close. “G'night, y'all..” He murmured, breathing his last breath. Ryan's breathing hitched as he heard it. He was going, Shane was leaving. He's _dying_. Ryan let out a cry, “No – No!” He wanted to shake him, but his hands fazed through.

He curled his hands into fists. He hated not being here, why is he so pathetic? Another cry escaped his shaky lips. Everything grew silent once more, pain engulfed Ryan whole. His heart was shattered.

This wasn't how everything was supposed to go! Shane was supposed to be roaming around, exploring. Visiting creepy places with the co-host. He was supposed to blabber about nonsense, and sing passionately like the loveable idiot he was to the goddamn songs that played in the car. Smiling and making everyone laugh.

He was supposed to move on from loss, he was supposed to live to the fullest and enjoy his life the best he can. He was supposed to meet Steven, Adam and Andrew. Talk about nothing with happiness and smiles that could last for ages, not this! Not dying! He didn't deserve this. He isn't supposed to be lying around cold and empty and –

_Cold. Empty._

His eyes were wide as he realized one thing.

He couldn't sense Shane anymore. 

It's over.

Shane is gone, it's too late.

Around him were the curses and the panicked responses. But Ryan couldn't hear them, he only wanted to hear Shane. But Shane couldn't talk, because Shane isn't _here_. He's not anywhere! He's gone. It's over. The agony was overwhelming, is that what he felt? What he felt when he was alive? Alive and well? Ryan sobbed.

Everybody crowded around at the pavement, soon, the ambulance came and took him away. His _corpse_ away. Adam, Andrew, and Steven watched with wide eyes, they quickly ran to their car to catch up. To see if he's okay. To see if he's even breathing but he isn't and _it's all so miserable_ –

Ryan stills. Maybe it doesn't have to be. He tries to push out the voice that shrieks and claws at him with fear, sadness and longing, screaming _he's gone it's all over I failed it's lonely I couldn't save him he's gone dead left for good it's over_ and he strives for the positives.

Is there any positives? To Ryan, there was. To others, there wasn't.

He was created out of thin air. He'll just have to follow where the ambulance goes, he'll be there. He'll wait for him. There's still hope. Even if it was an illusion.

Ryan stretches his wings and flies with haste towards the hospital.

_Everything is going to be fine._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry (not sorry).  
> If it makes you happy, there's still more.  
> Everything is going to be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> this is so painful to do on mobile ;; I hope my sacrifices weren't in vain! I hope you enjoy it nonetheless!!
> 
> it's probably going to start sucking dick at the end though. oh god.


End file.
